By now your baby is interacting readily with the world and sleep patterns may well be changing to meet these additional needs. Often babies will go through a growth spurt around 6 months and require more frequent feeds for a period of time. He may even have begun some teeth movement and this may disrupt sleep somewhat.
Another consideration now is solid foods and how this is best woven into an already full schedule. Your baby is likely to be rolling and there will therefore be more movement around the cot during settling and sleep. Parents often find this time quite challenging at first.
Time to loosen, then remove the swaddle, move to the cot, if this hasn’t happened already and you may choose this time for your baby to move to his own bedroom for sleeping. This is also an ideal period to discontinue dummy use, so this doesn’t become even more tricky later.
This is a lovely time to introduce your baby to a more structured day. Parents have often been looking forward to more routine, and therefore being able to rely somewhat on when your baby is awake or sleeping …. within reason. This is a period where parents often find their parenting confidence.
What is an age appropriate routine for a 6-12 month old?
A useful routine at this age might be the following:
- 6-7am waking
- sippy cup of water, breakfast
- breast or bottle feed
- 7.30-8.30am nap (1.5-2 hours would be ideal!)
- 11am sippy cup of water, lunch
- breast or bottle feed
- 12pm nap (1.5-2 hours would be ideal!)
- 3pm breast or bottle feed
- nap (powernap of 40 mins-1 hour, or longer if shorter naps earlier in the day)
- 5pm sippy cup of water, dinner
- bath or shower
- breast or bottle feed
- 6.30-7pm Bedtime!
Your baby will learn to rely on the rhythm of routine, whatever you chose it to be, and there is a certain comfort in this familiarity.
Some troubleshooting ideas regarding your baby’s sleep
Ensure your baby is getting enough food by working your way up gradually to 3 meals a day and an adequate volume of food at each sitting. Although each baby’s food requirement differs somewhat, I have always found gently working towards a cup of puree/mashed foods that require a spoon, and then, when developmentally ready to sit in a highchair, the addition of finger foods at each meal, a useful guide.
Having a full tummy, followed by the breast or bottle feed approximately 20-30 minutes after a meal to down regulate your baby, enables the clever use of ‘food coma’ to drift into sleep.
Ensure the offer of cooled boiled water via sippy cup with each meal. This will allow your baby to become used to the flavour of water, rinse teeth before and after a meal, and, of course, optimise bowel regularity.
On the topic of poo, a constipated baby, or at least a baby who has poo sitting in their rectum (the very end of the bowel), when they are trying to settle, will struggle to relax into sleep. So sort any poo concerns out first.
Teething pain is very real, as is the low grade fever some babies will suffer during teething. Those sharp little pearly whites do have a habit of starting to move in the gums just when a baby is trying to relax into sleep. You may choose to give an analgesic to your baby, such as paracetamol, prior to sleep. This will not only provide pain relief, but may reduce the fever also. Besides, I often wonder if babies also suffer headaches with fever, as we do.
What can I do to help my baby to learn the skill of self-settling sometimes?
- This is a lovely age to begin to allow your baby a little ‘head space’ to play alone, whilst you are nearby but not necessarily playing with him on occasion. This gentle approach to teaching your baby to separate at times, is often a nice way of seeing your baby ‘in full view’. Admire him from a small distance, as he plays on the floor mat or on his uncle’s lap. Often the full view of your baby is difficult when they are attached to you always. Take this opportunity to watch your baby interact with others, whilst you look on. Separating in this way whilst awake will assist in the early steps of your baby feeling secure enough to separate for sleep.
- Prepare your baby for sleep prior to moving to the cot. You or I wouldn’t expect ourselves to settle to sleep directly after running about the house doing housework. Most of us read a book or watch some television whilst relaxing on the couch, prior to going to bed. Likewise, your baby should not be expected to be picked up after play, or the excitement of a story book, and then drift straight to sleep. Consider the warmth of a bath, a quietened house without television or too much activity, a breast or bottle feed, a short cuddle and quietly humming or singing a sleepy-time song in a dimly lit bedroom, followed by gently placing your baby in the cot. This is a lovely way of providing your baby with the environment to learn the skill of down regulation.
- Our bodies secrete our natural hormone of sleep, known as melatonin, when we are in dim light, so make sure your baby is exposed to a slightly darkened space for approximately 10 minutes prior to going to bed. Ideally, this should occur during a feed and whilst you share your sleepy-time song prior to being put in the cot at naps or bedtime.
- Remember you are your baby’s biggest distractor. For survival of the species, it is important that he seeks you out and is often on ‘high alert’ for your presence… mostly for feeding and protection. But it also means that if you are in the room, he might spend much of his energies trying to engage you. This poses some problem when sleep is needed. For this reason, try to allow your baby to have some time alone in his cot, provide a small soft toy (I often use a small skinny bunny) and perhaps a comforter. Rather than lay there and get bored and therefore cry, he will have something to occupy him. Your baby often needs to play to sleep at this age. To do this, he needs to go to the cot reasonably rested, rather than overtired and restless, so put him to bed early always, rather than waiting until he is overtired.
- Don’t sit in your baby’s room for long periods whilst he is trying to settle. If, after you place him in the cot, he is playing, talking, or having a rhythmic grizzle (known as verbal rocking), leave him to it. If you are needed, enter the room, don’t speak, don’t lay him down, just sit on the floor, place your hand between the bars, resting your hand on the mattress or holding his hand, and lay your head on your arm on a stool or the seat of a chair, facing your baby, with your eyes closed. Sit here no longer than 5 minutes or so and then slip away. I call this a ‘drive by’ – you may need to do 4-5 drive bys in the early days, before your baby begins to learn the rhythm of your approach. If, after an hour or so of trying, your baby is unable to fall asleep, get him up for a short period. Have a cuddle, go for a short walk, give him a top up feed, if appropriate, and start over.
When is it appropriate to use this approach to settling?
Drive bys are a lovely gentle approach to teaching your baby how to separate for sleep and learn some self-settling skills, with your close support. Your baby will become familiar and find comfort in this rhythm, beginning to need you to ‘put them to sleep’ less over time.
This approach to settling a 6-12 month old may be useful for all nap times, day and night, and if resettling is needed. A sleep less than1 hour long, is simply a catnap, likely one sleep cycle only, and is not a satisfactory sleep.
Please remember that an overtired or unwell baby needs many, many cuddles and to remain close to you, so this approach may not be appropriate during these times.
Copyright Louise Shalders
