Sometimes bad things happen to good people. Relationships break, careers fold, accidents happen, our hard work ends in bankruptcy or redundancy, our great kids make bad decisions - and sometimes this has nothing at all to do with us.
It's always important to look at what we can learn, and how we can grow through the mess, but it doesn't mean we caused it or deserved it, or that we could have done anything to avoid it. What's needed is a gentle surrender - not in the way of giving up, we always have to fight for us - but in the way of surrendering the need to rewind or understand or hang on to what should have been.
Mental health disorders can make it extremely difficult for new and expectant mothers to get through the day, let alone manage during pregnancy, respond to the needs of their infant or attend to other children.
Research outcomes from Beyondblue have revealed that many depressed mothers describe feeling no joy. Instead, they feel like they are down a black hole, numb, detached, alone and/or unable to cope or interact with their baby or their life. The sense of hopelessness can often feel overwhelming.
"All I wanted to do was to just crawl into bed and stay there, on my own, and everyone to go away - including my baby and my mum."